The Barbarian’s Guide to the Civilized World

  1. ALWAYS BRING YOUR MAP 
  1. Every man has at least one belief that will carry him to a madness beyond all reason or logic. The word for this condition is called “ideology.” 
  1. Do not ask a civilized man why he is spending his money on something he doesn’t need. It never goes well. 
  1. Civilized folk are quick to mistake disagreement for a slight. Be careful voicing your opinions. 
  1. Civilized men are impolite because they know they can do so without getting their skulls split. 
  1. Every civilization has their own gods. Every single one. The man who denies them is as foolish as the man who follows them unquestioningly. 
  1. Civilization is the whim of circumstance. Break the skin and you find the ape, roaring and red-handed—though it is usually best to avoid this. 
  1. A sword that doesn’t bend shatters when struck. Make it to soft and it will bend and break. The same is true of a barbarian in the civilized world.  
  1. Lords and ladies hide behind perfume. On the road, shit has the decency to stink. 
  1. A man who’s got no fear is missing a friend 
  1. Civilized folk will hate you, anger you. You must hold onto that anger. Drink from your well of poison. These things are not good things, but at least they’re yours. 
  1. Civilized folk have a strange fondness for corpses. A fool may scrawl on a slate and if no one has the wit to wipe it clean for a thousand years, the scrawl becomes the wisdom of ages. 
  1. Many people will say the best swords have names. These people are called morons. Avoid them at all costs. 

Author: Connor M. Perry

From an early age, I learned how to divide by four. See, two minutes after I was born, I discovered three other newborns hot on my heels. I was a quadruplet. And I needed to learn to how to share. Everything. At an early age, I took to writing so that I could have something unsharable. I began writing small stories online for my own enjoyment, and gradually moved to more ambitious ideas. I've been running my blog The Mythlings for two years now, publishing a new installment every Friday. I've enjoyed creating different worlds, characters and relationships in my stories. I currently live in Worcester, MA with my girlfriend, two cats, and a collection of swords.

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